girl, so confusing
Let me talk about "Giddy Barber Explodes in 11", this post is not spoiler free so if you’re looking for a general summary you can scroll to the end. I spent most of the book alternating between cringing at the main character's choices and wanting to shake some sense into her entire family.
The story starts with Giddy going about her "normal" routine - and I use that term loosely because there's nothing normal about a 15-year-old waking up at 4-5am every morning to prepare her siblings' meals and get them ready for school. She's the second oldest in a family of five children, but somehow she's become the “responsible one” who has to manage everyone.
The result? Giddy is constantly tired and sleep-deprived, always late to her own classes because she's too busy making sure everyone else gets to school on time. Her mind is just this endless rolodex of tasks she needs to do.
Everything shifts when Giddy discovers an online post about someone who cured their depression through "opposition therapy" - basically reversing all their habits and doing something unexpected each day to spark new feelings. Inspired, Giddy decides to conduct her own 10-day experiment where she'll do the opposite of her daily routine.
Watching Giddy's choices throughout this experiment was like witnessing a car crash in slow motion. I kept thinking "girl, you really didn't have to go THAT far," but I had to remind myself that she's a teenage girl going through it. And I was once like her, making impulsive and reckless decisions because that’s all I knew at that point in time.
So many of her experiment choices were questionable. Like when she decided to explore her sexuality by asking the guy she KNEW had a crush on her to kiss her cause she wanted to know what kissing felt like. Why would you pick someone who's clearly into you that you have repeatedly rejected? And then when that predictably went badly, she decided maybe she's into girls and asked the lesbian couple at school to recommend someone she could kiss. When that also didn't work out, instead of just accepting it didn't click, she lashed out at the other girl and said horrible things to her.
I'm like, Giddy! You didn't have to make it worse! Thankfully, she does apologize later and tries to make amends with the people she hurt during the experiment.
Despite all the mess, Giddy uncovers some genuinely life-changing realizations. She discovers her "dream" of becoming an engineer was never really her dream - it was just something she was naturally good at that her parents reinforced. When she starts actually engaging with her supposedly "weaker" subjects like English, art, and history, she realizes there are parts she connects with.
During art class, she had to create a fashion outfit for 2050 and made this bizarre combination - a sombrero with a huge yellow cloth stapled to it that would completely cover whoever wore it, giving them privacy and a corner to themselves. Sure, it wasn't functional (she couldn't see and kept bumping into things), but the concept came from her own experience of not wanting to be perceived, and her teacher appreciated that she put herself into the artwork.
She also realizes her friend group is toxic. They spend all their time putting down other people, and Giddy realizes she's constantly walking on eggshells, monitoring what she says so she doesn't become their target for the day. When she sits with a different lunch table during her experiment, she discovers what actual healthy friendship looks like - where you can tease each other without trying to humiliate anyone, where there's mutual affection and support alongside the jokes.
The most satisfying part was watching Giddy explode after bottling up everything for so long - the responsibilities, lies, and general confusion of being human.
The book doesn't pretend that doing this 10-day experiment magically solved all her problems. She's still a work in progress, and that's not a bad thing.
When her mom tries to tell her "okay, you've had your fun, now go back to being the eldest daughter and make sure the house is in order," Giddy actually says no. She tells her mom she wants to do her own after-school activities, that she wants things that are just for her, and that her siblings are old enough to get themselves to school. Yes, girl! Rebel! I was so happy for her.
"Giddy Barber Explodes in 11" is a good book if you want to read about complicated family dynamics and what it's like being the eldest daughter trying to figure out her identity while dealing with random high school shenanigans.
The sudden romance subplot at the end felt unnecessary, but excluding that part, I enjoyed the ending tremendously. It's a messy, realistic portrayal of a teenager trying to break free from expectations that were never fair to begin with.